Freedom Through Faithfulness

John 3:16
“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”

Let me tell you a secret about what’s been holding me down in every season of my life…

God.

I even have a ring with a scripture engraved on it — John 3:16.

For me, this scripture means everything.

It reminds me that God loved me so much that He sent His one and only Son to suffer and die so that we could have the opportunity to spend eternity with Him. When I really think about that kind of love, I don’t know how I can’t be thankful.

And right now, in this season of my life, I feel like God is refining me.

He’s applying pressure.
He’s rebuilding me.
He’s reshaping me.

And what happens when you apply pressure to a beautiful rock?

You get a diamond.

So watch me turn into a diamond through this season.

This season hasn’t been easy.

I’ve moved back into the home I once ran away from. At the time, I needed to leave because I was going through heartbreak with my daughter’s father, and I needed familiarity and somewhere that felt safe.

I never thought I would come back.

This house holds so many memories — some beautiful, but also some memories of how lonely I felt and how I used to see myself.

So coming back hasn’t always been easy.

But God has a funny way of taking you back to places you thought you had outgrown and showing you that you’re not the same person who left.

And that’s what I’m starting to realise.

I’m not coming back to the same house as the same woman.

I’m creating something completely different.

My daughter is three now, and she doesn’t remember living here before. To her, this is just her home.

And honestly, watching her play, be free and have space to be herself has been beautiful.

We’re building a different kind of bond here.

We’re creating new memories in a place that once held memories I wanted to forget.

And I want to create traditions for me and my girl.

I want a girly little home for us.

I want us to laugh, dance, have movie nights, decorate for Christmas, make memories and look back one day and realise that God gave us a beautiful life even when I couldn’t see how He was going to do it.

Because right now, I am starting over.

New season.

Same home.

No job.

Starting university soon.

A new school for my daughter.

New responsibilities.

New beginnings.

And if I’m being honest, it’s overwhelming.

There are moments where I think, “God, how am I going to do all of this?”

But then I look at everything He’s already brought me through.

And I remember…

He has never forsaken me.

Even when I didn’t know what was next, He was there.

Even when I cried, He was there.

Even when I felt alone, He was there.

Even when I didn’t have the answers, He was providing.

And the crazy thing is, sometimes God has provided things for me that I didn’t even ask Him for.

He just knew what I needed.

He’s also surrounded me with people who check in on me, keep me distracted when things feel heavy and remind me that I don’t have to carry everything by myself.

And that is why I can say that even though this season is difficult, God has made me one of the happiest I’ve been in a long time.

How can that even be?

Because happiness isn’t always about having perfect circumstances.

Sometimes it’s knowing that God is with you in the middle of imperfect circumstances.

I’ve prayed for so many things.

And God has answered me.

Sometimes not when I wanted Him to.

Sometimes not in the way I expected.

But always in His timing.

And sometimes I genuinely cry because when I look back at where I was and where I am now, I can see just how good God has been to me.

John 3:16 reminds me that before I ever asked God for a house, a job, a relationship, a future, a better life or anything else…

He had already given me the greatest gift.

Jesus.

That’s why I can be thankful even while I’m waiting.

I’m thankful because I’m still here.

I’m thankful because my daughter is here.

I’m thankful because God has given me another opportunity to start again.

I’m thankful because I’m going to university.

I’m thankful because I’m building.

I’m thankful because I’m healing.

I’m thankful because I’m becoming.

And most importantly, I’m thankful because God is still God in every season.

The season might change.

The circumstances might change.

People might change.

But God doesn’t.

So if God is applying pressure to me right now, I’m not going to run from the pressure.

I’m going to let Him refine me.

Because if diamonds are formed under pressure…

then baby, just watch what God does with me.

I’m not starting over without Him.

I’m starting over with Him.

And if God has carried me through every season before, I know He’ll carry me through this one too.

Maybe this season isn’t here to break me.

Maybe it’s here to reveal me.

Maybe God is taking everything I’ve been through and turning it into something beautiful.

So yes…

I’m becoming a diamond.

And I’m going to let God finish what He started.

Until the next chapter, Beloved.

— Alesia x